It's been such a long time...

If you aren't hearing Boston after reading that title...you didn't grow up with my dad. Loooove Boston! But, really, it's been forever since I posted. Sorry about that. The end of June and July so far have been pretty whirling for me. The last week in June I was preparing for my hubby to come home for his last leave before he deployed. Ten amazing days flew by and then he was gone again.We packed a lot into that time. We saw lots of family and friends, got to visit the newest addition to our family (my cousin's sweet baby boy), caught a movie, went to the gun range with our dads, had a party for Stud and saw fireworks on the Fourth, had a date night at the Melting Pot (yum!), managed to work out twice together, went to church, kayaked, played laser tag, hung out at the pool, finally picked out some wedding pictures (it's been a year and a half!) and just enjoyed being together. It was great. Saying goodbye, though, was really not great. Man, do I hate that part. Stud had to go back to CA for about a week before he actually left for Afghanistan.

By Wednesday of that next week I was in the swing of my normal routine, though still missing my husband terribly especially knowing that we were now in the long haul and that it would be several months before we would see each other again. That night on the phone, Stud casually mentioned that he had the weekend off and all I could think about was how much I wished I could be there to spend that time with him. Thursday morning I couldn't help but texting, "Would it be ridiculous to try to come out this weekend?" Expecting my much-more-level-headed husband to say something to the affirmative, his response of, "No, it wouldn't. Last chance to see me," sent me into a frenzy of surfing travel websites and making calls. Just a few hours later I had the approval from work to take a half day on Friday, the commitment from my dad to bring me to the airport and pick me up and a seat on a flight out to San Diego.

I gotta admit, I felt a little like a crazy person making such an impulse decision to leave the state, but that didn't last long. I was so excited to spend one more weekend together, and it was such short notice that I didn't even have to spend more than two days in aggravating anticipation!

I wasn't able to get a direct flight there (or back), but even leaving at 2:45 pm I got to San Diego at about 6:00 pm (I love gaining those two hours in the time change). The plan was for him to get a ride to the airport and meet me there, but he didn't get released until an hour and a half after he expected so he was running late. I decided to go ahead and take the shuttle to get our rental car and meet up after that. I had arranged to rent a Dodge Charger to surprise Stud because he is all about the Charger right now. I was pretty bummed, though, to learn that they didn't have one on hand when I went to pick it up. I was informed that one was supposed to be coming back very soon and, since I had to wait for Stud to get to San Diego anyway, I decided to wait at the car rental station and see if the car would come in. I waited FOR-E-VER. The lady who had helped me felt bad for me for waiting so long so by the time Stud was getting to San Diego (over two hours later than expected), she offered me ANY car in the place. "Take the convertible!" she said. Oh yeah! So out of the rental station I drove in a pristine, white Mustang convertible. They were so nice that they even said they would call when the Charger came in and we could switch out the cars if Stud still had his heart set on a Charger. The minute, though, that he got in the convertible he assured me that there was no way we'd be exchanging it for the Charger. Ha! We absolutely loved driving around in that baby all weekend.

That whole experience of waiting for Stud and not getting the car I thought I wanted was the only hitch in the entire weekend...and look at how it turned out! Free upgrade! The whole weekend was beautiful. Absolutely amazing.

Stud is gone now. He's in Afghanistan and I won't see him for 7-9 months. We've both been treasuring the memories from that weekend and letting the good times be our comfort when we're missing each other.

So, partly for my own therapy and partly so you can share in the magic, here are some pictures from our blissful final weekend. Oh, and I apologize for the crappy picture quality. They were all taken with my phone.

Our ride for the weekend: 

Ha! Just kidding. This baby was parked outside of a great restaurant we love called Escape Fish Bar in the Gaslamp Quarter on Friday night. It caused quite the scene. The owner, wherever he/she was, left it like that with the doors open for at least a half hour causing everyone to gather around it staring or get their picture taken with it. 

You seriously MUST go to this restaurant if you are ever in San Diego. The food is delicious and both times that we were there (we went there the first time I went to visit Stud), the owner was there working and mingling with the customers. It's a small operation but I think that's what makes it so good. Can't wait to go back there.

 

Check out their website here.

Ok, serioulsy. Here's what we got to drive all weekend: 

Who is that handsome man?!

 That car was a blast. Driving around was fun all by itself...just had to remember the sun tan lotion! All the guys on base wanted a ride (partly just because almost no one has their own vehicle) and we had a ton of fun testing its limits on freeway.

Now here is a look at some of the fabulous food we ate at a restaurant in Seaport Village called the Harbor House: 

Check them out here!

We ate on the patio overlooking the water: 

Photos courtesy of the Harbor House website.

Oyster shots! What a kick!

After an amazing dinner we took a ride in a horse-drawn carriage, just like we did on our honeymoon in New York City. 

His name was "Doc"

And a little later that night...

Fireworks on the water.

make animated gifs like this at MakeAGif

And here is where we stayed: Camp Pendleton (45 miles North of San Diego).

Where Brandon was living; the front gate to Camp Pendleton.

Stud had to spend some time packing

That little roll is one day's worth of under clothes: shirt, shorts and socks.

And getting a haircut

Those guys can cut a head of hair in about 7 minutes! Haircuts are a weekly requirement for all Marines.

On Sunday, our last day, we visited Old Town again (we had gone there a couple times the last time I visited Stud). That area, and a lot of San Diego, is filled with beautiful, flowering trees.

 

It almost makes up for the fact that San Diego is sooo dry. I'm always happy to be surrounded by green when I get home.

I wouldn't know how to reproduce the shots below but I think they're kinda cool!

The nature here is so different from home. There's always something really cool to look at.

You can't really get more vibrant colors.

It is such a beautiful place and there are shops everywhere. It's the historic heart of San Diego so most of the shops have a Mexican theme to them and their are lots of Mexican restaurants from which to choose.
We happened upon a lovely wine bar with the most inviting outdoor seating.

We lounged there for awhile and shared a bottle of our favorite wine. It was so relaxing and lovely.

Even their bathroom was a sight to see, painted as a scene from the bottom of the sea:

I definitely want to go back to that place. We were the only ones there so it was marvelous. Of course, not many people are drinking wine at 2 or 3 in the afternoon, but, hey, it was our last weekend and we can't help what time of day we stumble across a delightful wine bar.

The fantastic thing about this weekend, other than the simple fact that I was with my husband 24/7, was that it was a bonus. Completely unplanned. We had no idea that we would get this time together and since we had already spent several days in San Diego a little over a month before, there was no pressure to "see" San Diego. Of course, no matter how many times you go to San Diego, there will always be new things to see and do, but we didn't really do anything new this time. It was low-key and perfect. It was comforting and romantic to visit some of the same places that we had seen the first time around, like they were "our" restaurants or "our" nooks. So to finish off our last day, we headed to La Jolla, a place where we had dinner with a view of the sun setting on the ocean that last time we were in the city. We were too early for the sunset this time, but that didn't matter. The restaurant is called Brockton Villa and it has a great patio that sits a couple stories above the road that runs along the coast. From there you can see and hear the seals sunning themselves on the rocks and playing in the water.

This was our view last time:

And this is where we sat this time:

Click here to see a virtual tour of this ocean-side restaurant.

After we ate there, we walked down to the coast and explored a little. It was really pretty.

I do wish we would have had a little more time there. There was so much to explore there and it was beautiful. They even had a little cave/tunnel down by the water that you could go in.

Here are some more pictures of the incredible wildlife.

We got a glimpse of the sunset at the very end. 

From there it was back to San Diego to drop off the Mustang and catch the shuttle to the airport. The USO at the airport conveniently offers rides from the airport back to Camp Pendleton so Stud was able to be with me right until I had to go through security. We got to the airport with about 30 minutes for getting checked-in and saying goodbye. Brandon waited right on the other side of security to wave goodbye at the very last moment that we could see each other, just like I had done when he left Minnesota and we thought we wouldn't see each other again before he left. That goodbye was super hard. You wonder if you're hugging him for the last time ever and seeing his face for the last time. Even if you try not to think that way, it creeps in. 

God must have known I needed a distraction because that flight (to AZ for a quick layover) was the first time I've flown where I chit-chatted with the person next to me. Without that person to talk to, I probably would have wallowed in the sadness the whole flight. In no time I was on the next flight on my way home to Minneapolis and was thrilled to learn that I had been upgraded to First Class so that they could seat a family together. I didn't believe it at first but after checking and double-checking my ticket I was delighted to sink into the extra big, leather seat where a pillow and blanket were waiting. I slept almost the entire flight home, even it was only two and a half hours. I had to work the next on only about three hours of sleep but I would have put myself through a lot worse than that for the chance to spend that last weekend together.
 

Hail-o Kitty

One of my biggest anxieties when we found out that Stud would be deploying again was the fact that I would be living alone. When he first deployed, I was in my last semester of college and after that I lived at home. I never felt scared or anxious about my safety. If something happened, I was surrounded by people who could help or at least communicate the situation to get help.

Living alone is one of the many factors that make this deployment to Afghanistan a totally different situation for us than his first deployment.

1. We're married. When Stud went to Iraq we had gotten engaged right before he left so not only was I not recognized legally by the USMC as his dependent or family but more importantly I was planning a wedding mostly alone!

2. I have a full-time job. My last semester of college only took up about two months of my time while was he gone last time. After that I spent months looking for a job...which I finally landed about two weeks before he came home. All of that downtime really seemed to make things worse.

3. We have our own place. A blessing and a source of anxiety at the same time. It's awesome to have my own place while he's gone but I also worry about having to handle emergencies and bad guys criminals if they were to come up.

4. Experience is a great teacher. Not only have we already been through a deployment but we've been married for a little over a year and have been able to learn more about each other and the way the military works in that time.

All things considered, we are in a better position this time around and we know that no matter what, God will sustain us. Even if we were somehow in a worse position heading into this deployment, trusting God and leaning on His truth is the only surefire way to succeed at anything. Even in the suckiest of situations, we are better off if we know God than we are not knowing God in the best of situations. Fact.

That being said, I still get a little freaked out a times and as much comfort and companionship as I get from our two lovely lady cats, Analie (Ana) and Derby, even they can be a source of anxiety. They're living "situation gauges." You can always tell how they feel because their emotion is written all over their fury little bodies. They purr and close their eyes when they're happy, they meow and rub against your legs when they want love food, and their hair rises and they arch their back when they're trying to intimidate one another -- you've gotta know that Ana has a nub for a tail so it turns into a pom pom when she's riled up. It's usually pretty easy to tell what's going on with the girls...especially since the expression I see most often is unconcerned languidness. In fact, here is a snapshot of the lounging ladies from last night:

They're fine. They're happy. They're mellow. Even though I know they're just cats, their attitude draws me in and I feel more relaxed when they're relaxed. Humans are cue-readers. We scan each other looking for information. Just try standing in the middle of the mall and looking up at the ceiling for a few minutes and see how many people walking by will look up to see what you're looking at. We all seek information and reading peoples reactions to situations can be a bigger source of information than the physical cues of the situation itself. We got to watch a video in my college Social Psych course of an experiment of the power of situational cues. The subject was asked to wait in a room with several other people who were in on the experiment. After waiting for a short time, smoke started entering the room from under a door across the room from the door the subject entered. The subject sees the smoke but looks around to see how the other people in the room react. The other people remain seated, acting totally indifferent and unmoved by the now-increasing smoke entering the room. What does the subject do? Does he run from the room yelling fire? Does he inform the other people that he sees smoke or ask what's going on? In several different trials, the subject remained seated being so over-powered by the "information" he was receiving from the others in the room, the cues telling him that there was nothing to worry about, that he ignored his own common sense. We saw that video and thought those subjects were crazy! But we all put more stock in the actions and reactions of others than we care to admit.

Now I hate to relate that all back to my silly cats but cats have expression too! So this is what happened. We three ladies were having a quite evening. I was working on my laptop in the living room and they were chillin'. All of a sudden I look out our sliding glass door to the porch and see a curtain of rain fall almost instantly. The cats were fine with that but when the thumping of hail hitting the roof followed, this is what I saw:

The poor girls didn't know what to think. Derby put on her detective hat and cautiously explored the porch with me but Ana retreated under the bed. Luckily in this situation I didn't have to rely on the cues of my cats alone to tell me if I should be worried, knowing so much more about weather than they do. Ha! But imagine what I might have felt if I hadn't known what was going on. When the living things around you show signs of fear, it can be hard to not feel a little fear yourself.

Come on. Look at that face:

You might think something were up too if you saw that.

Anyway, the tornado sirens went off and I locked us all in the bathroom (which didn't go over well with the cats) but it passed and we were all fine. So back to the point, I can't say I wasn't thinking about the outer wall of our apartment being torn off and not having my hubby home to help me deal with it. This living alone thing will have its ups and downs for sure. I am confident, though, that this isn't a novel anxiety. God's in control of this too and I figure as long as we're commanded to "Cast all your anxiety on Him for he cares for you," it's probably a good plan of action. Even if there is some hail sometimes.

I saved that piece in my freezer. Is that weird? I told myself it's so that I could show Stud when he comes home for his ten-day leave between training and deploying...I think I just secretly wanted to keep it for no good reason.